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How to live well with Menopause

Updated: Feb 13, 2023

Menopause the Golden Gate to development, maturity, and sovereignty. Menopause marks the end of our personal fertility and the transition to mature leadership free of distraction, dedicated and wise, which our children, our grandchildren, the earth and all its inhabitants need so much.

Unfortunately, we live in a societal system that promotes the idea of being younger.

In such a society, the elderly and the old are seen as less valuable, because they no longer contribute to society in the same way as when they were younger, they no longer produce (the attitude is that for the economy they only cost money, pensions, health).

Already from childhood, as we witness the transition that our mothers experience, we grow up with the knowledge that during menopause we (and our family) must bear a bundle of negative symptoms during the inevitable decline of Estrogen and Progesterone.

Perhaps some sadness and grief arise which reflects an end of an era, as well as the movement towards aging and death.

In addition, many of us experience physical symptoms such as dryness, hot flashes, irritability, insomnia, headaches, anxiety and more.

Did you know that along with us women, there are a small number of mammals that, like us, experience a period of the cessation of their fertility?

The Killer Whale - Orca

Orcas photo credit Mernock

Studies in whales reveal to us the possibility that the cessation of fertility is an evolutionary development which is probably not related to the non-production of eggs in the ovaries.

While most males die in their 30s or 40s, female Orcas live well into their 80s.

As an evolutionary drive, Orca ovulation ceases. They stop giving birth, so that they can concentrate only in leading their offspring and ensure the sustainability and future of the community.

While the Orca's daughters are busy creating the next generation and taking care of the continuity of their species, the adult female Orcas are free to support and lead their communities to safety, guiding them to important food sources.

It is the experience and wisdom of the grandmother Orca that make the difference between life and death in icy water.

On an evolutionary level, maybe we are not so different to the Orca.

I want to invite you to look at menopause from a different angle.

The menopause as a gift of mature sovereignty.


The age of knowing

In our mid-life, at the cessation of our feminine ovulation, perhaps we too are called to embody our aged wisdom and skills to heal and deepen our connection to ourselves, assume personal responsibility and maturity so we may lead our communities (family, local, international communities).

If until now the monthly bleeding purpose was procreation, a movement out of the body, now instead of flowing out it is being absorbed into the body.

As if the Infinite wisdom of the blood, of life itself is now absorbed inwardly, nurturing, strengthening our bodies so that we may lead onwards our future kind towards a sustainable and inclusive world, in a way which supports and aligns with the biosphere and promotes our conscious evolution.

If during puberty the main development is hormonal, physical, cognitive, and to an extent emotional, in the process of pre - menopause when the hormonal system changes again, the main development is emotional, spiritual, soulful. Resulting in maturity.


What now?

The process of all life development teaches us that there is always a transition period

A 'in between’.

Neither a girl nor a teenager.

No longer a teenager but not yet a young woman.

Nine months of pregnancy but not yet a mother.

We too were given years to adapt, the years in which we are in the transition itself.

The transition periods are the bridges, the opportunities to heal, renew, develop, and mature.

The Way

The symptoms begin years before the cessation of the fertility cycle (menopause). The experience is very personal and very different from woman to woman. There may also be a difference between women who have given birth to those who have not.

1st stage

In Perimenopause, we notice that the menstrual cycle begins to change in its consistency, the quantity and quality of blood, physiological symptoms, and an initial change of the body. Perhaps the beginning of hot flashes, the vaginal skin may begin to feel thinner, a change in libido and even some confusion and fear of the future, as well as possible relief for some.

2nd stage

The menopause is determined after a year has gone by with no bleeding.

The body continues to change. We may put on weight or hold fat in different areas of the body. We may experience dry hair and / or vaginal dryness. Some will experience stronger heat waves, a disturbed night's sleep, despondency, mood swings, fear, feelings of grief, uncertainty, and questions about the way forward, of meaning and purpose.

These are all ‘organic matters’ that we can process, digest, and integrate.

3rd stage

The post menopause stage marks the end of the process, although I do not experience it this way; I see it as a continuous movement of development and emergence.

The body finds a new balance at its own pace. If we accept the symptoms and choose to learn from them, embrace them as part of emotional growth, we will feel a tremendous leap in our emotional maturation, in our resilience, and in hosting in ourselves more of the world as it is and be a part of it, motivated not by fear but by responsibility and love.

Our mature feminine wisdom, which is needed in the 21st century, is less about finding food, but rather in assuming responsibility, rising up to our maturity and developing wholeness and comprehensive vision towards healing our world's systems.

When you courageously choose to heal yourself, you are already a brave leader, you are already part of the change, you are the change.

It was a gift for me to go through this transformation and at the same time witness the process.

It will be an honour to accompany you too, along the way.

If you want to hear more contact me.

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